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I remember the first day I cried by myself in my room. I was so frustrated/sad because I felt like NO ONE understood me- if someone understood me in a spiritual way there was a cultural, generational, language gap. This was the beginning of God's project called: "Breaking & Humbling Iris." Sometimes I think how cool it would be to have recorded my whole time in Japan- kind of like a reality show. After everything was said and done, how would I feel while watching what I did/felt/said for 10 months? I think we should try to make this happen for the future 1 year missionaries. HAHA.

It's weird because I can say that this week was the best & worst week thus far. But I would like to consider it my best because I really felt God working. It's painful to be disciplined and trained but I believe that in the end, I will come out with deeper faith and trust in God. No need for details but I would like to say thank you for your prayers... they are truly covering me and I felt so empowered/encouraged by them this week!!!

Although I'm physically so far from my parents, it's crazy how I think we're actually getting closer. We don't get to see each other every week but God still works in His mysterious ways and has brought our family closer together. When I was growing up, I heard of mom and daughters being best friends... and to be quite honest, I never really understood that; I thought it was like an "American" thing. But now, I am realizing why people say that and it's true... my mom is my best friend. I tell her everything. :0) There are over a million reasons I love her... and this is just ONE of them: she writes me emails (color-coded) in English & Korean to encourage me with her words of affirmation & love along with the WORD. I love my family. I am TRULY blessed. I realize that more and more while being in Japan. -_-;

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Iris,

"우리가 알거니와 하나님을 사랑하는 자 곧 그의 뜻대로 부르심을 입은 자들에게는 모든 것이 합력하여 선을 이루느니라 "

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

네마음이 힘든것 다안다.

예수님도 네 마음 다아시니, 가까운 날에 큰위로를 주실 것이다.

엄마 아빠보다 더 너를 care 하시고 계시리라 믿는다

엄마가 계속 기도하고 있다.

"그가 나를 단련(Discipline)하신후에 내가 정금(Pure Gold) 같이 나아로리라"

I love you so much!!!!!!!

Love Mom

Song of the moment:

Refiner's Fire

Purify my heart,
Let me be as gold and precious silver.
Purify my heart,
Let me be as gold, pure gold.

Refiner's fire,
My heart's one desire is to be holy
Set apart for You, Lord.
I choose to be holy
Set apart for You, my Master,
Ready to do Your will.

Purify my heart,
Cleanse me from within and make me holy.
Purify my heart,
Cleanse me from my sin, deep within.

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I know this is from God because He's been using 3 different people to tell me the same verse in a span of 3 days. -_-; Thank you, God, for being so loud and clear. I like that God's so direct. This is what's been on my heart lately...

Then He said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?"

-Luke 9:23-25